Reflections on 10 Years of Motherhood

I would add – when one of your kids is struggling, carve out one on one time! Schedule a doctor’s appointment super early so you have time to grab ice cream before the other kids get off the bus! The beauty of getting that quality time with on of your kids (without the distraction of siblings!) is pure gold.

Coming up on five. For everyone in that stage (maybe all of the stages), I add what it’s taken half a decade for me to learn: Don’t worry about your laundry pile!

I expected number 6 (although I’ve since realized that an aesthetically pleasing, orderly space is a big component of my mental health).

What I did not expect was to spend so much of my time maintaining toys, from the $600 playhouse a family member insisted in gifting (but we persuaded them not to buy the electric Jeep!) to the mountains of crafts they bring home from PreK.

We are drowning!

My “baby” is 33. I love all the moments, comments and memories above but let me tell you this ……. Being mommy never ends and that’s the beauty of it. Yes we’re still his parents but we’re also now his friends, his confidants, his support system and sometimes his reality check. Of course now that comes when asked for rather than whenever we feel necessary, but it’s asked for and that’s a beauty in and of itself. So I will add …… Parenthood doesn’t end, it simply evolves.

Love this!

Congrats on ten years of motherhood, Grace!!

I do believe we need to add
1. when everything turns to mush, remember to give them (and yourself) a glass of water
2. If it is still mush (often won’t be) offer food.
3. Oops you are in for a doozy.

Raising a very grumpy baby I learned that actually a glass of water solves most challenges. Even at work when I am frustrated I make myself grab a glass of water before responding, and it tends to work.

I’m also a decade in! My advice is more listening, less talking. Quality time over quantity of time. Apologize for your mistakes, and lead with love. XO

I’ve also surpassed a decade of motherhood (my oldest is 11) and all of this is so true.

Also – print your photos! i read somewhere that this generation is the most photographed and most likely to be “forgotten” because we have so many photos on our devices but don’t get the tangible evidence. Make photobooks! Print photos!

Everything becomes emotional – emptying drawers of outgrown clothes, end of school year, beginning of school year…

My daughter is 6 and #6 is a perfect encapsulation of this phase. Specifically, my living room floor is always trashed with her “projects:” currently there is a plush horse in its “stable,” a collage, some pieces of cardboard she’s crafting into sculptures, my yoga mat, a book, some stuffs, etc… It wins no design awards! But we are moving next week (!! ack don’t ask me if I am ready!!!) and even though we’ll have more space for a play room, I decided that I still want to have most of her toys and materials in the living room so that she can play downstairs while I’m cooking, etc, rather than banishing all toys and mess to the upstairs play room. So maybe I will be less cranky about the mess in the living room now that I am actively choosing it? I know she’ll be sequestered in her room during the teen years soon enough and just want her to know that I love having her close, mess and all.

It keeps getting better!
People always post these sappy sad things about their babies growing and how “babies don’t keep” as if we should mourn and be depressed as our children grow. That is true in some ways but in many it is not! My girls are now 7 and 4 and it is WONDERFUL. The excitement of Halloween! New seasonal jammies. The giggles in bed. They eat breakfast and watch tv on the weekends while my husband and I lounge in bed with coffee! They sit for family movie nights. We travel! They have playdates with their friends and occupy themselves! It is SO MUCH FUN and keeps getting sweeter.

The short order cook resonates like you cannot believe!
Between the 10yr old AND husband, I am thisclose to saying ask Alexa what is for dinner! lol

Compliment other mothers in public. I remember two incidences when strangers complimented our young family while observing us enjoying a family meal and ordinary discussion. That was over 35 years ago, and I STILL recall how important that was for me to hear. Also know that one day you will go be able to eat at a nice restaurant and no one will end up under the table.

Only been a mom for 4 months, and boy does this check out.

I know there’s a big demographic of bio parents in this community, but just thought I’d throw a request out to see more posts about stepparenting. Transitioning into blended families, what those highs and lows look like, etc… Feels like there has to be a group of us that are 30s-40s either remarrying or entering into established families after separations and divorce. Some of us who’ve never parented before! Wish there was more out there for us and I trust that this community has great insight. Xx :)

The shortest year of your life is the span of time from giving birth to hearing them tell a stranger “I have a peedis and you have a vulba” in the grocery store checkout line

And the longest year of your life is the time it takes a toddler to get out of the car of their own volition when it’s 100 degrees out and you have to pee

My biggest learning: when kids are out of sorts, water usually helps: Swimming or a water table, a bath or shower, or a glass of ice water.

I’m coming up on 10 years of being a parent. I went into labor the day of Sandy Hook, and reading about the Alex Jones trial stuff is making me cry, thinking of the kids who died just as my daughter was about to come into the world.

I really appreciated this today. My 9 year old is definitely moving into tween territory and I’m both excited and terrified of what is to come based on her brief flashes of teenager-hood recently. It helps to remember everything is a phase, and also that the important thing is she still knows how much I love her- even under all that eye-rolling. :)

This is giving me ALL the feels today as I reflect on a long phone call with my son last night, who is struggling to settle into university life. To the parents with babes still at home, savour this time where you can help them navigate life’s phases and changes in person – it is so hard to transition to helping them from afar…a strange mix of sorrow, pride, anxiety, hope and yes, some grief.

I’m going to print this and stick it on the fridge.

Ah, the library silence of children. So far it has happened twice. Once I came in to find the kids had painted an entire wall of their bedroom in toothpaste. The other time I found my daughter naked during nap time and she had dumped the entire contents of her dresser into my son’s crib. Somehow he remained asleep through the entire thing. Also, not sure why the task had to be accomplished naked.

Yes!! A thousand times, yes!!

And this place here is such a gift. I joined the CoJ community a decade+ ago too while preggers with my first and now a “seasoned” mom of three I still come here to learn, laugh, cry and feel connected.

Happy Fri-yay!